Second Chance of a Lifetime
by Sailorprinzess
Summary: Ch 7 Is Up Syaoran is now the most popular actor in Japan, but when he was in school, he dated Sakura. Their relationship ended over something he did with another girl. What would happen if they met again?S&SR
1. In the Beginning

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Card captor Sakura. 

Hello all! Here is another CCS fic. I know I haven't finished my other one, Princess Hunting, but I promise I will. Right now I just wanted to freshen my mind with a new story. I know that sounds weird, but it helps me to think about the other story.

Well I hope you enjoy this, and please review!

**Two Chances of a Lifetime **

**Chapter One**

Tomoyo always told me that one day I'd find my soul mate. She said that it takes a girl a long time to go from kissing frogs to kissing Prince Charming. Even though I love her and she is my best friend, I don't take what she says to heart. I mean, this is a girl whose dated more guys than I have ever seen. This is why I do not take relationship advice from her. It would not be a smart thing to do, however I am the one who broke up with Li Syaoran, the most popular drama actor in Japan.

I know, what you're thinking. I am going to regret it the rest of my life…

Anyway I never thought much of love. Sure I always loved to be kissed and cuddled, however I rarely felt anything for most of the guys I dated. Syaoran was an exception. A big exception. We met before he was famous in high school. Even then he was very popular, especially with the girls. He was everything in school: top pitcher for the baseball team, senior class president, lead in all of the school's plays, homecoming and prom king, and top of the class. I had the biggest crush on him. He had the looks and the charm. He was the perfect package, however for the longest time he was taken by Meling Li. I hated her very much, because she was dating the guy I wanted. Even though I really didn't have a chance with him, I was still upset for her being with him.

This may seem like the typical jaded one-sided love story, but it's not. I honestly began to think he liked me too. He'd always smile and attempt to talk to me. I knew he wasn't asking for help in trigonometry either, since he had the highest grades in the class. So this triggered something inside of me to take action. I couldn't sit down and let him slip past me before we graduated. So Tomoyo, who is the film editor for the drama club, got me the lead female role in our school's Romeo and Juliet. Now I am not very good at acting, but I managed to get the role anyway.

Syaoran must have been impressed, since he asked me out to eat after opening night. I of course agreed and we went to a tiny diner a few blocks away. We had so much fun just talking and telling random jokes. It was surely the greatest night of my life. I never wanted it to end, nor did I want to forget all the words he spoke. They play over and over in my head as a constant reminder.

_"Sakura-san, can I ask you something?" Syaoran asked, nervously playing with a packet of sugar._

_I swallowed hard, wondering what he wanted to ask me. "Sure, Syaoran-san," I replied._

_He looked down at his fingers and then back up at me. He was about to speak many times, but quickly stopped, hesitating. Whatever he wanted to say to me must be of some importance, since he was acting very coy, unlike his usual coolness at school._

_"What is it?" I asked, eager to know._

_"Ummm… Would you---" he suddenly stopped, and shook his head. "I mean---"_

_Is he going to ask me if I want to go out with him? If so then the rumors of him and Meling breaking up must be true! Oh my God! I feel as if my heart will explode in excitement!_

_He took a sip of his water and wiped off his mouth. "Would you g-," he paused, and pulled out a piece of paper, "go---give me your autograph?"_

_"My autograph?" I asked. "Autograph…what?"_

_I felt horrible. There I was picturing him and I together and all he wants is a stupid autograph. Instead of exploding, I felt my heart slowly crumble._

_He nodded. "Yeah. We can exchange autographs, just in case one of us gets famous." He eyed me over and smiled a fake smile. "You know, it would be cool."_

_I narrowed my brows at him. He hardly made any sense, however I felt something different with the way he was acting. He may be a good actor on stage, but in real life circumstances he wasn't very good._

_"You want my autograph?" I repeated, just making sure. He nodded, and I signed my name: Kinomoto Sakura. "There you go."_

_He looked at it and smiled. "Thank you, Sakura-san." He then took out a piece of paper and placed it on the table. He slid it across the wooden planks, his fingers pressed against it. "Here's mine. But don't look at it until I leave."_

_"When are you leaving?" I asked, and looked down at the paper. "You didn't even sign it, though."_

_He quickly stood up, and placed money on the table. "I have to go, but hopefully we can do this another time." He smiled one last time, with a wink. "See ya!"_

_After that he left the diner. I sat, speechless and unable to comprehend what had just happened. He left me alone, with a folded piece of paper with nothing written on it. How nice. I thought he was a sweetheart and smooth talker, but he ended up being everything but._

_I sighed and crumbled up the paper in sadness. I just needed to get out of there. As I stood up and paid the rest of the bill, I noticed ink on the paper he had given me. I picked it up and opened it. It was blank, so I turned it over. Then as I seen what was written on it, I fell back onto the booth seat. My body went weak._

_It read: "Dear Sakura-Chan ( I hope it is okay to call you that), I gave you this note, because I probably couldn't tell you in person. I want you to know that I really like you. Ever since you sat behind me in ninth grade cultures class, I felt something for you. I couldn't tell you that, because for some reason I felt a long distance between us. It isn't your fault, so please don't think that. It was mine. All mine. Now that Meling and I are over, I want to know if you'll consider being with me. You do not have to give your answer right away. I can wait. As long as you want me to wait, for the ocean between us to become a stream."_

_At the bottom of the note his name was signed, the way a professional does. I felt like the most important person in the world. All because of Syaoran._

Even though what happened between us is like a deep scar across my heart, reading that letter still gives me the same feeling it did when I first read it. It was the feeling of free-falling through the clouds, surfing the highest wave, riding the tallest fastest rollercoaster, and weightlessness. I wanted to wrap that feeling around me so it could always be at my side. Yet I couldn't. My heart wouldn't let me. All because of Syaoran.

To Be Continued…

Please Review!


	2. Just a Player in Love

**Disclaimer:** I do not own CCS. 

Hello everyone! Here is the next chapter. I hope you are enjoying the story so far! I really take pleasure in writing it, since it's something different I guess. Please review to tell me what you think!

Oh and I make a reference to Gackt, a Japanese singer. I name his song Vanilla, so in order to get the full effect of the "joke," please visit the following link to better understand what I mean: http/

**Chapter Two**

"Look at him, Sakura-chan," Tomoyo said, pointing across the hall to a guy standing by the water fountain. "He is so cute. Not Pikachu cute, but Hello Kitty cute."

I rolled my eyes. "Like there's a difference, Tomoyo-chan."

She nudged my arm and said, "There is! Hello Kitty is definitely cuter." She straightened and lifted her phone. "You will be next." She took the guy's picture and then admired it, sighing in satisfaction.

"You know, Tomoyo, you don't have to 'Catch 'em All!'" I said, getting annoyed. "What if a guy is doing this to you?"

She smiled. "I'd be flattered. It would be great if a guy chased after me, you know? Having that happen makes a girl feel important."

I shook my head in disagreement. "It would make me feel like a piece of meat that everyone wants."

"Sakura-chan, don't be like that. And anyway, guys like to be chased, it gives them bigger egos and self confidence. So why not lend a helping hand?"

"I don't know about you," I said, and began to walk to my next class. "I'll see you later."

Sometimes I think Tomoyo really doesn't believe in love, even though she has so much advice on it. She wants to pretend that she knows everything, although she really doesn't. She treats guys horribly, pretending to care for them and then eventually moves on to another one. It's sad, since someone always ends up getting hurt, and it is never Tomoyo. I'm not going to lecture her about it, but someone has to tell her that it's not a game like she thinks it is. One day she'll see, karma has way like that.

After high school I decided to go to college upon my father's wishes. So I enrolled into Sophia University for the fall semester. I wanted to study abroad, but that was out of the question, especially since my brother Touya wasn't aloud to either. So just like getting my brother's hand-me-down sports equipment, I also had to walk in his footsteps. What happened to being free?

Currently I am a student, but I am also a waitress and actress for the college's drama club. I am also struggling to make ends meet, which is another reason I don't have time for a boyfriend, or anyone for that matter. I embraced this new stage in life thinking it would be for the best, but when is it going to get better?

"Sakura-chan!" Tomoyo shouted, running towards me. "I did not lose my touch!"

I squinted at her, as the sun beamed down on my face. I was sitting in the field, trying to study for my Chemistry test. "Tomoyo-chan?"

She had a large smile on her face. She looked as if she just won the lottery or something. However she never seems to lose any happiness. She is always happy, even if something goes wrong, there is always a smile on her face. I don't know how she does it, since a lot of terrible things have happened to her. Maybe being wealthy makes you happy…

"What is it?" I asked, curious of what she would say.

She whipped out her phone, a picture of a guy on the screen. "I got him!" she exclaimed. "He is so cute, don't you think?"

I nodded. It was the guy that stood near the water fountain from before. He was tall, long black hair, and a muscle build. He was handsome, but didn't seem like Tomoyo's type. Not at all. He looked to rugged and wild. She usually went for the Abercrombie-and-Fitch-wearing-carries-a-large-mirror-in-pocket guy. As always though, I didn't say anything, although even if I did say something she would get offended and mad. While I am just looking out for her, she'd think I was invading her private life and being to mother-like. Either way she'd get hurt, so I'd rather him to be the one to hurt her feelings then me.

"Congrats, Tomoyo," I said, and smiled. "I am happy for you."

She put her phone away and kneeled next to me. "Sakura, next we will have to find a guy for you," she said. "You can't be shunning yourself from every guy you meet just because they aren't Syaoran."

I instantly glared at her and pushed her to the side. "I am not shunning myself, Tomoyo!" I exclaimed. "I am sorry, but please to not think that."

She gave me a frightened look and moved a little bit away from me. "I am sorry, Sakura-chan. I didn't mean to make you upset. I was just--"

"It's okay," I said, and stood up. "I'm leaving."

I began to walk away, even though Tomoyo kept calling me to stop. I needed to get away from her. She made me so upset by saying that. I am not shunning myself away from guys, but for some reason no matter how many times I said that to myself I didn't believe it. I knew she was right, but I didn't want to hear it out loud. It made it too real.

To me Syaoran was perfect. He always called me even if it was only to say hi, we'd go for walks, always told me he could not wait to see me, and he was always there for me when I needed him the most. Of course he was very handsome with an equally good looking body, but there was more to him than what met the eye. So much more, and I was lucky enough to find that out.

_"Sakura-chan," Syaoran said, opening up the picnic basket which I had packed earlier. "You didn't have to do this all by herself. I would've helped."_

_I smiled. "I know, but I wanted to," I replied, blushing. "All girlfriends pack lunches for their boyfriends."_

_He placed his hand on my cheek and began to lean in, closing his eyes. I laughed and lightly pushed him away. "Ewww, Syaoran-chan! Your breath smells like onions," I said, laughing._

_A smile crept along his face and continued to move in. "Come on, Sakura-chan, it's not that bad," he said, continuing to smile devilishly. "Don't you want to kiss me?"_

_I couldn't stop laughing. Him being so close to by body, being practically a few centimeters away; it made me nervous to the point of laughing uncontrollably. I didn't mind him being so close, but I wasn't used to it, so I didn't know how to react. I assure you that I liked it, though._

_"Ok, ok, Sakura-chan," he said, and sat back down. "I'll stop, but that still doesn't mean I will give up trying to kiss you later."_

_My cheeks turned red, heart raced, and stomach fluttered with butterflies. It felt amazing, I loved it very much. Considering we didn't kiss yet, it's like we already have, due to the emotions I am feeling. I was so happy, it was the feeling of being full. Full of what? I don't know. Maybe it was being fully complete. That may sound cliché, but that's exactly how it felt. I finally found my Prince, or at least someone like him. I could only think of being with him, and no one else, ever._

_After out picnic we stood by the tiny bridge that reached across the pond. Sakura blossoms made a canopy of pink flowers hovering over us. It was like a dream. It really was._

_"Syaoran," I said, having the overwhelming feeling in my stomach. "Look at me."_

_He turned, his eyes beating down at mine. "What is it, Sakura-chan?"_

_I knew I wanted to, plus I couldn't fight the urge. I grabbed a hold of his shirt and pulled him closer to me, his face just inches from mine. "Kiss me," I whispered, breathing heavily. And so he did._

_The perfect setting, the perfect guy, and the perfect kiss. His lips felt so soft on mine that it sent shivers all over my body. Although I could not believe I was so aggressive, I was glad I did it._

_That moment we shared continued to play over and over in my head. I didn't mind, though, since it made me smile. I never wanted to forget that kiss. Along with our other kisses we will share, our first one will always be remembered dearly. Forever will it be in my heart._

When I reached my apartment, I was met with Tomoyo. She sat at my door, playing with her phone. She looked as if she had been there long, since her shoes were off and her hair was pressed up against the wall.

"Tomoyo-chan? What are you doing here?" I asked, reaching for the keys in my pocket. "I was not expecting to see you here."

She quickly put her phone away and stood up. "I know you weren't," she replied, and smiled with bright eyes. "I have a surprise for you!"

"What kind of surprise?" I asked, giving her a strange look.

Usually Tomoyo's surprises aren't really surprises. They are more like nightmares. For example for my eighteenth birthday she thought it would be funny to take me to a male strip club. And it turns out that my biology teacher is a stripper there. So you can imagine my shock and horror when seeing him dancing to my favorite Gackt song "Vanilla." That among all of her so-called "surprises" aren't very happy memories.

"I don't like your surprises, Tomoyo-chan," I said, and went to unlock my door. "They are never good."

She laughed and patted my back. "Don't worry, Sakura-chan. This will be a good surprise, just you wait and see" She reached in to her purse and handed me two tickets. "Get ready so we can go."

The tickets were for a "Diner with the Stars, Under the Stars." It was a banquet to raise money for some variation of cancer. It looked like an expensive event.

"How did you get these?" I asked, and continued to study the tickets. "This looks expensive. Did you steal them?"

"Honestly, Sakura-chan. You have no faith in me," she said, rolling her eyes. "They were given to my father, but he can not go, so he gave them to me. And don't worry, everything is paid for."

My eyebrows raised in interest. It isn't every day I get to celebrities, plus how could this turn out to be bad…But then if there are celebrities are there, then that means… "Wait. Tomoyo-chan, I can not go," I said quickly, opening my door.

"What do you mean?" she asked. "You have to go with me. I do not want to go alone."

"Take that guy friend of yours," I said, and walked inside. I took of my shoes, and got ready to close the door. "Call me later to talk about it."

I didn't even step a few meters when the door swung open. Tomoyo stood in my doorway, looking determined to get me to go. "Sakura-chan! You are going and you can not say no," she said in a firm voice. "It is important for you to go!"

"Why, Tomoyo-chan? Why is it so important?" I asked. "You don't understand why I can't go."

"Tell me why. Give me one good reason," she said, wanting to know. "If you give me a decent reason I will not force you."

I closed my eyes. I didn't want to say. I couldn't say his name. It was hard, but I had to. "I don't want to see Syaoran there."

She laughed, and placed her hands on her hips. "What makes you think he will be there?" she said. "It's not like he is a much wanted celebrity these days anyway. With all the scandals these days of him seeing all those girls, how could he be as popular?"

"I know about those scandals, Tomoyo-chan. I just don't want to see him, you know?" I said. "It would be too upsetting after what happened."

"Sakura-chan, I can almost guarantee that he won't be there," she said. "Even though has a waning status, his appearance would make a huge controversy. It would be all over the papers."

She was wheeling me in with her sincerity. I didn't want to leave her to go all by herself, despite my fear of seeing him. I couldn't say no to her.

"All right, Tomoyo-chan," I gave in. "I will go with you."

"Awesome!" she exclaimed, and hurried into my apartment, making sure to take off her shoes first. "Let's get dressed like celebrities!"

I shook my head smiling. "Tomoyo-chan, we aren't five playing dress up."

She shrugged her shoulders, and pulled me into her bedroom. "And your point? Besides you have those sexy dresses from drama club just collecting dust."

"Tomoyo-chan," I said, with a tired sigh. "What am I going to do with you?"

So I allowed her to dress me up and do my make up. I really didn't mind, but the thought of Syaoran there didn't let me enjoy the star treatment she was giving me. I was just so scared of seeing him. I don't know what I'd do.

**_To Be Continued_**

**_Please Review!_**


	3. Meeting Again

**Dislcaimer:** I don't own CCS. 

Hello again! Here is the next chapter! I hope you like it. This is a little longer than the others, but hopefully just as enjoying. Don't worry I will get to the reason why their relationship ended in the next chapter, but you'll probably get the idea after you read this chapter!

Enjoy!

**Chapter Three**

Tomoyo insisted on dressing up to go to the big banquet dinner. And I mean really dressing up. We wore evening gowns I had from being an extra in the school's version of Cinderella. She forced me to do up her hair and she did mine. We painted our faces with make up and strapped high heels to our feet. I felt like I was going to a wedding or something. However Tomoyo seemed to have fun with it, so I did not say anything.

"There you are, Sakura-chan," Tomoyo said, finishing me off with blush. "You look so beautiful."

I smiled. "So do you."

She shrugged and tossed the blush powder back in her purse. "I try," she replied.

Tomoyo was never modest. She always thought very highly of herself, even getting to the point of arrogance. She had a high self-esteem that seemed to keep her happy all of the time. I envied that. I do not have a high self-esteem, especially after what happened between Syaoran and I.

"Okay, let's go," she said, and walked to the door. "They are waiting!"

I stopped in my tracks and glared at her. "What do you mean by that?" I asked, and stepped closer. "Who will be waiting? If this is a scheme of you--"

She waved her hand in the hair. "Oh, Sakura-chan, you are always one to jump to conclusions. Let me finish for once," she said, and sighed. "I meant that everyone will be waiting for us, considering they don't serve the food until everyone who paid is there."

"I see," I said, a little weary of her answer.

For some reason I felt like she was lying to me. Tomoyo is not exactly one to tell the truth all of the time. She loves to con people, she could be a professional in swindling people if she wanted. I've gotten used to it though, since it is a part of her. I'm not sure when she started being like this, since I've known her since we were in diapers.

The restaurant the banquet was being held at was absolutely amazing. It was a white marble with columns erecting from the ground at the entrance. Ivy sprawled across the walls, creating wrinkles against the wall. It looked like something from a movie or something. You know, like one of those expensive restaurants that only the wealthy could afford. I felt so lucky at that moment. I was important, maybe even if it was only for that night. It didn't matter. It made me feel so good inside, more happiness than I've felt in a long time.

I hate to admit that he was the only person to make me feel special and wanted. He went out of his way to do stuff for me, even though I told him not. Every time he seen me he would smile that big brilliant smile, the kind that you keep for a special person. He shown me a lot of him that I never thought could exist in a person. I was the only one to see him like that: him cry, him laugh, him sad, him happy, and him affectionate. When I was with him nothing in the world mattered. It was only him and I forever… if only forever lasted longer…

_His hands grazed over my body, shivers following quickly after his fingers. It made my heart pound wildly, breathing to go haywire, and my stomach to leave my body. My body felt like it would explode in any minute, but I liked it. I loved when he touched me with such softness. It was taking me to ecstasy._

_"Is it okay to touch you?" he whispered, his hands resting on my arms. "I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable, Sakura-chan."_

_I was laying on my back while he was laying sideways towards me. We were in his rooms, since my father would flip if I took a guy into my room. Even though I am eighteen and about to go to college, he still thinks I am ten with pigtails rollerblading in the driveway. He'll always think that._

_I nodded and looked up at him, my eyes half-open. "You can touch me, Syaoran-chan," I replied, and lifted his hand to place it on my stomach. "I want you to."_

_He smiled, and leaned in to kiss me. I couldn't let him know how badly I wanted him. I needed to feel the warmth of his body on top of me. To have his arms wrapped tightly around me. For our heart to beat against each other's chest. I wanted all of that, and only from him. He was the only one to make me feel the way I do. I don't think anyone could ever get me to be like this: so relaxed and comfortable. With him I don't have to worry about anything. I feel so protected and loved. I wanted to be with him forever. Even though I am young, I mean it. I could never find anyone like him, ever._

_His hand slowly slid under my shirt and made its way to my chest. I didn't stop him. I only closed my eyes and took in the moment. And right then I made a promise to myself that Syaoran is the one, and nobody would ever fill the space he has in my heart._

"Sakura-chan? What is that smile on your face for? You look weird," Tomoyo said, gripping onto my arm. "Let's go inside."

I shook those precious moments out of my head and followed along with her. When we got inside it even more beautiful than the outside. Everything shined like gold and silver. I felt like I was in a Greek God's palace with all of the granite statues and water fountains. It was so amazing that I couldn't keep my mouth from dropping.

"Wow," Tomoyo and I said in unison. We probably looked like two young kids in a candy store. We were in utter shock of how huge and incredible it was. Sure we do live in Tokyo, which has many of these places, but never have we actually been inside. However Tomoyo's family is very rich, but they usually just buy expensive food since they have a cook that will make meals for them.

"I wonder if I can take photos?" Tomoyo asked, getting her camera phone ready. "I definitely have to brag about this!"

I nudged her shoulder. "Tomoyo-chan, don't you think that will make us like we don't belong?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "Well we really don't, you know. I mean who cares what these people think, we will never see them again and most of the are snobby celebrities."

"True," I agreed, and looked around.

I didn't see him anywhere, which took a big weight off of my shoulders. I don't know what I would do if he was here, plus if he was with another girl. I would die.

All of a sudden Tomoyo gripped my arm and pulled me around the many tables to where we were supposed to sit. Our table was in the back, by a balcony. It was really nice, since the moon's silver light beat down on us. It would be a romantic setting for a date or something, but then I don't look at Tomoyo like that, so I guess it is a wasted moment.

At the table we plates and cups were already placed in a formal setting, along with a ton of silverware. It was overwhelming to look at, but Tomoyo said she's show me what to use, since she had to take classes on this stuff. I knew I could count on her at certain times, even though most of the time she's out chasing guys.

"Look at all the celebrities!" Tomoyo exclaimed, vigorously scanning the room. "Maybe I should ask for autographs?"

I smiled, and glanced around. All of the famous people sat, well mannered. Money and fame must change people. I know a lot of people looking to score high in the entertainment business, and a lot of them are wild and offensive. So maybe all of that stuff really transforms people, or they are of course, just acting like it.

"Hey Jiro!" Tomoyo exclaimed, waving her hand in the air. "We are over here!"

I quickly looked to where Tomoyo was waving, and saw two guys walking toward us. And the one looked very, very familiar. It was none other then the guys she took the picture of that one day. The one she said she "got." I had no idea what was going on, but then this must be one of Tomoyo's schemes, I should've known.

"Tomoyo-chan! What is going on?" I asked, furious. "What is that guy doing here, and why did he bring someone with him? Are you trying to set me up?"

She smiled awkwardly at me. "Calm down, Sakura-chan. You are causing a scene," she said, and waved her hand in front of my face. "I am not trying to set you up. I just want you to meet other guys instead of weeping over Syaoran. It's been six months, Sakura-chan. I don't want to see you hurt anymore."

"Tomoyo-chan…"

"No, Sakura-chan. You are staying here, you are not leaving. Stop running away from life," she demanded. "Don't you think he has moved on already? He probably is with that girl, whatever her name is. Don't you think you deserve to be happy too?"

I wanted to cry, but then I wanted to smile. My face and heart couldn't make up their minds. So I kept it all inside. Plus Tomoyo was doing this for my sake, even though I am totally against it. I don't want to meet anyone new. I want to just be…whatever that means.

"All right, Tomoyo-chan," I said softly. "I will stay, but that does not mean I will like this guy, ok?"

She nodded and smiled. "Thank you, Sakura-chan."

The two guys made it to the table. Jiro sat next to Tomoyo and the other one sat next to me. He was not as rugged looking as Jiro, which was good, since I realy do not like that style. He had his hair slicked back and he was wearing nice clothes. He had manners, too, since he immediately tried to introduce himself.

"My name is Kai, and I attend Tokyo University," he said, and put out his hand. "And you are Sakura-san, right?"

I nodded. "Wow, you go to Tokyo U? You must be smart!" I said, smiling. "I attend Sophia University."

"That's a very good school," he replied.

I glanced over at Tomoyo, who was locking lips with Jiro. Honestly, that girl never stops. She doesn't care if others are around, she'll do whatever she wants. However I envy that trait of hers. I always do stuff to please others, like never acting out or speaking up for myself. I worry too much what others think. If only I acted that way when I should've…like that time with Syaoran… I don't like to think about it, since it hurts, but I get reminded about it whenever I see people kiss and be intimate with each other. I think it will always be like this.

After ten minutes or so dinner was being brought out by waiters and waitresses. The food smelled so good and made me really hungry. I couldn't wait to eat. As we waited, though Kai seemed really interested in getting to know me. He wanted to know everything from my favorite music to favorite color. For some reason I began to feel butterflies in my stomach and my heart pound slightly faster. I wasn't sure why. I thought the butterflies were dead after all this time and my heart hardly ever went faster than its normal beat. Was something wrong with me? Or even worse, was I being to feel something for someone else other than Syaoran?

I swallowed hard and stood up. I had to get away from everyone, especially Kai. "Umm I will be right back," I said. "I need to go to the lady's room."

I hurried across the restaurant, dodging tables, chairs, and people. I needed to get out of there quickly. I reached the restroom and went to the sink. I turned the faucet and splashed water onto my face. It was cold, but refreshing.

"What is going on with me?" I asked myself.

I had no answer. I never thought I would feel this way again, especially with how heart broken I was after what happened with Syaoran. So how could I feel like this when love gave me so much pain at the end of it? How?

I ask myself that as if an answer is that easy to find. I felt so lost and confused. My body was torn in half. On one side my heart was telling me to like Kai and my mind was telling me not to forget Syaoran. I didn't know what side to choose, but then I was never good at picking sides. I was at a standstill, separated from each part of my body. Everything was tearing me apart, and I did not have enough stitches to connect all the pieces of myself.

After a few minutes, I dried my face and left the restroom. However when I left, I wished I would have stayed in there longer. There stood Syaoran, his eyes beating down at me. My feet were glued to the floor and my mouth was stuck shut. Nothing inside me moved, not even my heart.

"Sakura-chan… I mean, Sakura-san," he said, stuttering slightly. "Wh--Why are you here?"

I bit my lip and held back the tears that wanted to pour from my eyes. "Syaoran-san," I said in a low voice. I was angry to see him, but then I was upset. I wanted to shout at him, however my voice wouldn't go louder than a whisper.

He stepped forward a little, coming closer. "It has been a long time," he said. "You look well."

So did he. His hair was shorter, but looked so smooth. His body looked more muscular, with broader shoulders. Time has certainly been on his side. He also looked happy. I could see it in his eyes.

I nodded, and tried to give the best fake smile I could. "Thank you," I replied, and started to walk away. It was so hard seeing him, harder than I thought.

"Wait," he called after me. "Sakura-san!"

I stopped. My heart started to beat again, and my breathing became heavy. I felt my eyes begin to burn, signaling tears. "What do you want?" I asked, my back facing him.

His hand grabbed a hold of me and turned me around. "I want to tell you something," he replied, and dropped his hand. "I want to straighten some things out."

"It doesn't matter now, Syaoran-san," I said, shaking my head. "Everything between us is over. No need to bring it up. I understand."

He started to say something, when someone appeared at his side and grabbed his hand. It was Meling, and she looked at me with so much disgust. I wanted to tear her head off, but I restrained myself, considering there were too many witnesses.

"What is she doing here, Sy-chan?" Meling asked, and slithered her arm around his. "Is she trying to ruin our night?"

He looked annoyed that she was there, but did nothing to remove her from his side. "Stop it, Meling-chan," he said, and looked at me. "Let me explain."

I shook my head. "No need to," I said, and glared at Meling. "It looks like she won you back. It would've eventually happened anyway. Just like back then."

"That's not it!" Syaoran said, and stepped forward, dragging Meling along with him. "You have it all wrong. Honest."

"No, I don't think I do," I said, and stepped backward.

"Sakura-chan! This is where you were!" Tomoyo said, and then quickly made a grunt. "What are you doing here, jerk?"

He shook his head. "Don't be like that. I was just trying to--"

Tomoyo pushed me behind her and pointed her finger at Syaoran. "Do you think you could say sorry for something as terrible as what you did to her? Do you honestly think you could be forgiven?"

"I didn't mean to--"

"Be quiet! Don't ever come near her again, or I will have to get violent with Meling," Tomoyo shouted, causing people to stare. It even got to the point of people taking pictures, this seemed to get Syaoran uncomfortable, since her started to cover his face.

"Please don't cause a scene," he said. "And I am not asking for forgiveness, stop jumping to conclusions."

"Yeah, why would he apologize to people like you anyway?" Meling said, and laughed. "You are nothing."

This got Tomoyo mad. "Why you!" she said, and began to walk up to her, with the determination to injure her. I couldn't let her do anything, so I quickly grabbed a hold of her.

"It's not worth is, Tomoyo-chan," I said, and looked at Syaoran. "Please don't try to talk to me anymore."

Syaoran didn't care that Tomoyo was trying to hurt Meling. He just continued to look at me, with sad eyes. For a moment I actually think he wanted to be with me still. But then that just might be wishful thinking on part, even though I couldn't take him back. He hurt me too much.

"Sakura-san," he said, his eyes locked on me. "I am sorry for everything. I hope one day you could forgive me."

"I don't know if I can," I said, and pulled Tomoyo away.

"This is not over, Meling!" Tomoyo shouted, still flaying her arms about. "You will see!"

Meling laughed as she waved good-bye. "I'd like to see you try."

As I pulled Tomoyo out of the restaurant, I stared at Syaoran. I wanted so badly to leap into his arms, but I couldn't I could only look on. I still felt a lot of him that kept hidden in the crevices of my heart, but it would be too hard for me to come back to him. Harder than anything in the world.

I said good-bye to Kai, Jiro, and Tomoyo. On the way home I couldn't help to think about what had happened. Every second played over and over in my head. That was when I began to cry. No matter how hard I tried to hold them back, my efforts were useless. The tears continued to flow, no sign of stopping in sight.

Seeing him with Meling brought back bitter memories if that time… That time my heart broke in two…

_**To Be Continued…**_

_**Please Review!**_


	4. The Way We Were

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CCS. 

Hey everyone! I am sorry it took forever to get this chapter out! I have just been busy with a lot of stuff, but hopefully I will get the next chapter up with in a few days. I will try my hardest. Anyway please enjoy and review!

**Chapter Four**

_It was almost the end of summer vacation. Soon I would be entering my first semester of college and Syaoran would be getting heavily into the acting business. He was so excited for the both of us. He told me that we'd both succeed in anything we tried. We both supported each other. I guess you could say we were both each other's legs during tough and good times. We'd always hold each other up not matter what. He has always been like a rock, never crumbling, whenever something horrible happened. Making me feel strong, he gave me courage. I don't know what I would do if I ever lost him. It'd probably collapse into a billion pieces, not knowing how to put myself back together._

_He made me believe in myself. With him I could do anything, except fly, but even that somehow seemed possible at times. I wanted to tell him how much I cared and loved him. I practiced all day on what I would say and what I'd do. I'd take him in my arms and squeeze until he turned blue. Then I would kiss him forever. I would never want to let go, not even for a billion yen. Nothing would tear us apart. Nothing._

_I put on my favorite skirt and shirt. I don't normally brag, but I would say I looked very beautiful. Or maybe I just felt very beautiful. He had a way of making me feel like that, even when he wasn't near. It was comforting._

_"Where are you going?" Touya asked, and sipped his soda. "You know Dad is planning a big end of the summer barbeque."_

_I nodded, and gathered some things into my purse. "In know. I will be back later."_

_"Yeah, right," he said, and crumbled the soda can in his hand. "You better not bring that guy over, Sakura-chan."_

_I glared at him. "'That guy' had a name, baka. It's Syaoran," I said, and put on my shoes as I opened the front door. "I'll see you later."_

_I headed out. It was sunny and warm. The birds were chirping, adding to the happy atmosphere. It was beautiful; perfect for confessing my love to Syaoran. I couldn't wait. I felt like a little kid again, anxious and constantly happy. All because of Syaoran._

_We agreed to meet at the park, where we had our first kiss. That spot is so precious to me, so I thought it would be good to meet there. Plus I just wanted to test his memory to see if he remembered._

_When I got to the bridge, he was standing there talking on his cell phone. It looked like he had a mad expression on his face. I wasn't sure why, so I stood back behind a Sakura tree to find out what was going on._

_"…I don't want to talk to you…It's over," he was saying in broken sentences. "Don't say that…Because I don't…Stop it…"_

_I wasn't sure what he was talking to. Whomever it was, he seemed very mad to talk to them. I had some ideas on who it could be, but I tried to let myself think about it. So I jumped out from behind the tree and headed towards him. "Syaoran-chan!"_

_He quickly turned and smiled. "Sakura-chan," he said, and then went back to whoever was on the phone. "I got to go…Yes…No…Good bye."_

_He hung up the phone and hurried towards me. His face became happy and bright. That smile…the smile that is only for me._

_"I couldn't wait to see you, Syaoran!" I exclaimed, and hugged him. "Did you wait long?"_

_"No," he replied, and held me tighter. "I'd wait forever for you."_

_I wanted to melt in his arms. I felt so safe and loved when he holds me. The feelings I felt raged through my body, almost making me explode. I loved how he made me like this. The precious moments we spend together are very dear to me. I never had anyone quite like him, and I didn't want to lose him._

_"Sakura-chan, how about we go for ice-cream?" he asked, pulling back a little so he could look at my face._

_My mouth wanted to spew out all of the words I wanted to tell him. I wanted him to know how much I loved him and how important he was to me. Then maybe he would tell me he felt the same way. However I got so excited that the words got jumbled in the back of my throat and stopped them from coming out. My mouth was open, with nothing to say but stutter._

_"Is that a yes?" he asked, and pulled on the belt loops of my denim skirt. "Or are you just teasing me?"_

_"Uhhhh," I stammered. "I---"_

_He laughed and wrapped his arm around me. Pulling me forward, we walked side by side. That was when I started to think of walking with him forever always at my side. I didn't care how young I was to be thinking this way, I only thought of him. He is all I ever wanted and more. Never did I ever imagine being with any other guy. I wanted him to know that. I wanted him to know everything. However I couldn't. My mouth stumbled over the words that I desperately wanted to get out._

_"Let's go," he said, and pulled me along with him. "I'm kidnapping you for the day."_

_I smiled. I never wanted the day to end. I wish I could wake up every morning to this day. That would be absolute happiness; for at least the first hundred times._

_We went for ice cream at a parlor down the street. We shared a strawberry sundae. It was like one of those Lady and the Tramp things, except for we fought over the cherry on top._

_With him it was only us. Nobody else in the world was around or mattered. It was an amazing feeling. It truly was. And I was thankful for the way he made me feel, because without him I'd feel incomplete._

_Later on that day we went to his house, since no one was there. It seemed as though everything was going the way I wanted, which was unusual. Typically nothing ever seems to go my way, especially when it comes to matters of the heart._

_"Sakura-chan," he said, as we lay in his bed. "I want to tell you something." His hand traced the outline of my face and then swiveled below my neckline._

_I swallowed hard as my breathing grew heavy. "I--I want to tell you something, too."_

_He smiled. "Really? Then you go first," he said._

_My eyes widened. I couldn't believe I was going to finally tell him how I felt. I was afraid of what he would say, but I still wanted to get it all off my chest. However I still felt the words stuck to the back of my throat, but it seemed to get easier after I took a could deep breaths._

_"Syaoran-chan, you are really very important to me," I said in such ease that it even startled me. "I just want you to know that. And I l---"_

_I couldn't finish what I was going to say. It was a hurdle too high for me to jump. But somehow it seemed as if he knew what I wanted to say, since a big grin slid across his face. And he kissed me so softly that I felt the earth shake beneath us._

_"I love you, too," he whispered into my ear. "I love you more than anything, Sakura. You are my heart."_

_I bit my lower lip as if trying to keep myself from exploding. I was going to burst into a million pieces, but it felt amazing. It was like standing on the edge of a cliff with the wind blowing and you're about to fall, but you don't. You stay there, balancing between life and death. You feel a rush but you also feel relaxed, like you are ok. I didn't feel afraid. I was fearless._

_"Well?" he said, raising his eyebrows. "Aren't you going to say anything?"_

_"I am so happy," I blurted, and latched on to him. I squeezed him tightly, not wanting to let go. "You make me this happy."_

_He laughed and squeezed back. "You make me twice as happy."_

_For that moment or bodies were molded together, making one body. It was pure heaven._

_As we were kissing, there was suddenly footsteps coming up the stairs. "Damn," I heard him say, and the quickly sat up. "You have to hide somewhere in case it is my mom."_

_The footsteps were getting louder as they came closer. I stood up from his bed and looked around his room. I searched for a place to hide, but it seemed as though I couldn't find one. I was so scared, since I didn't want to get in trouble. If someone would catch us, we wouldn't be able to see each other again, or at least not be at each others houses by ourselves._

_All of the sudden the doorknob began to turn. All I could do was drop and roll underneath his bed, hoping I wouldn't be seen._

_"Who is it?" Syaoran asked, fixing his bed covers._

_The door swung open. I could only see two feet walk into the room. It must have been a girl since the person was wearing flip flops and had pink toenails._

_"Syaoran-chan! Why did you hang up on me? It was rude!" a familiar voice shouted. "I can't believe you!"_

_"Meling-san? What are you doing here?" he asked, anger in his voice. "I told you I didn't want to see you. Don't you understand?"_

_There I was hiding underneath his bed while they argued. I know I could have came out, but I couldn't I didn't want to get between their argument, plus I wasn't sure what she would do if she knew I was there._

_Meling's feet moved closer to the bed. "Syaoran, I don't want it to be over between us. "You told me that you would love me forever. You told me I was your heart."_

_What? I wanted to scream. He had told me that I was his heart as well. Or did he not mean it? I didn't know what to think._

_"Meling, that was the past. I do not love you anymore," he said, and swung his feet to the side of the bed. "So please leave."_

_She moved closer to him. "You do not understand." She was really close to him now, practically on top of him. "You still have my heart."_

_She took his hand and placed it over her left breast. "Don't you feel it, Syaoran-chan? It only beats for you."_

_I could feel his body move across the mattress, as if he were laying back down. I wondered what was going on, so I slithered out from under the bed. That was the moment I wish I were blind._

_"Syaoran?" I said softly._

_Meling was on top of him, kissing his face. He just laid there, not doing a thing to stop her. I was heartbroken beyond belief. There he was with her, but then just ten minutes ago he was pouring his heart out to me. It didn't make any sense._

_He quickly shot up. "Sakura-chan, it is not what is looks like," he said quickly, pushing her off of him. "I swear."_

_Meling laughed. "Don't be silly, Sy-chan. You know you wanted to kiss me," she said, and then looked at me. "You don't belong here, Sakura-sand. You can leave."_

_I did my best to hold back my tears. I couldn't let them see me cry. I didn't want them to know that he hurt me._

_"I am going," I said, and quickly ran to the door. I looked back at Syaoran, but he only stared at me helplessly. That made the pain even worse. He didn't even come after me._

_That night I cried until it hurt. All because of Syaoran._


	5. Broken Hearts and Bloody Knees

**Disclaimer:** I don't own CCS. 

pI know it took me forever to put this up. I am really sorry! I have been just so busy and stuff. I know that really doesn't make up for it, but then again I am sorry!

**Chapter Five**

I woke to the sound of my television blaring the morning news. My body felt so weak, while my heart felt heavy. I didn't want to move at all. What happened the night before broke me into pieces. It was so unbearable seeing Syaoran with Meling at the banquet. Usually I am so strong, but he is my only weakness. I don't understand it. Will I ever become resilient again?

My eyes burned from crying so much. I was becoming undone from my tightly fastened foundation. I didn't know how to stop it. The only thing I could do was cry, hoping it would all be better soon, but even that was hard to do. If I began to cry, I don't think I could stop.

I have come to find that stopping is the hardest thing a person could do. I can not stop doing a lot of things. I would love to be able to stop feeling the way I do now. I would love to stop dwelling over Syaoran. I would to stop breathing, just so I could stop being. I know that is overreacting, but I can't help to feel like that. Just for one moment I would like to just feel nothing. Just to become numb to everything. Then maybe I would be able to stop being in love with the one person in the world I care for most.

The sun came through the blinds, which eventually hit my face. I didn't want to wake up just yet, since I couldn't face the day at that moment. So I pulled the covers over my head and tightly shut my eyes. However as I lay there, something on the television made me shot up from underneath the covers.

The news was covering the banquet, but they were talking about something that happened there. Then suddenly there I was, fighting with Syaoran. They even got Tomoyo trying to go after Meling. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. They got the whole thing on tape!

"…Syaoran Li, top actor of Japan, has been caught in yet another scandal. Last night at a charity banquet an argument broke out between him and two relatively unknown women. Was it a lover's quarrel? Or were they disgruntled fans? Some sources say that one of the women is a past girlfriend whom he cheated on with his new girlfriend. More information will sure to come out as the day goes by. We are dedicated to bringing more as soon as we get it. Now back to you…"

My jaw dropped. I wanted to scream. I couldn't believe it. They actually taped us fighting and made it more than what it was. Plus how did they get all of that information? I didn't know my personal life was pasted everywhere. Now that it is, I don't want it to be. I mean, since when did anyone ever care what happened to me? I am not so special? I guess after being seen with a celebrity, everyone wants to come barging in to your life.

I quickly got up out of bed and hurried over to the phone. I dialed Tomoyo's cell phone, hoping she would be up to answer. After two rings, her muffled voice came over the phone.

"Tomoyo?" I said, desperately keeping myself from shouting. "Turn on the news. Right now!"

"God, Sakura, it is ten in the morning. People need to sleep, you know," she complained. "Where is the remote? Damn it…Here it is. What channel?"

"Six," I said, breathing heavily. "Hurry and put it on."

"Ok, ok. Calm down, jeez," she mumbled, the sound of her fumbling with the remote in the background. "Just because we are friends doesn't mean I won't kill you, Sakura-chan."

I heard her television go on. I could hear the reporter repeated what she had just said about the banquet. That was when I heard curses fly out of Tomoyo's mouth.

"What the…?" she exclaimed. "How did they get this?"

"I don't know, Tomoyo-chan! But what am I going to do? Now everyone will be posting my private life all over. You know how the Japanese media is," I said. "What do I do?"

She sighed. "Sakura-chan, I don't think you have anything to worry about. You are just a regular person, you know? More than anything, Syaoran would be the one to get the most torture from it. He's famous and they want to post his dirt all over the place."

I took in a deep breath and let it out. "Do you really think so?" I asked, feeling my heart beginning to beat again. "I have nothing to worry about? I just don't want everyone to know and I don't feel like getting chased around."

She laughed. "Sakura-chan, you worry too much. Seriously. You have nothing to worry about," she replied, and yawned. "Can I hang up with you now? I didn't get home until two in the morning. I went out with Jiro and Kai to a dance club."

"Sure. I will let you go," I said, about to hang up when I heard her say something. "What is it?"

"Kai thinks you are totally cute," she said, giggling. "He wants to see you again. I told him that we could go out again tonight. So be ready at seven. Ok? Bye."

"Wait, Tomo--" I couldn't finish because she had already hung up on me. It was her trademark. She wouldn't be Tomoyo if she didn't talk people into doing things even if they don't want to. But it is hard to stay mad at her, since she is Tomoyo. She is like a double edged sword that way.

I took a shower after getting off of the phone with her. I washed away all of my worries, hoping she was right about the media not digging up my past so they could put it all over. Maybe they are just interested in getting dirt on Syaoran and not me. For some reason, though I have a feeling they will try to find out who I am. I hope not.

I made my way to school, keeping my head down. I couldn't stop thinking about what was on the television. I wanted to forget about seeing him at the banquet with Meling. It was not something I wanted to remember. However seeing it this morning has brought back all of the feelings I felt about him and all the heartbreak. I miss him so much, although I won't admit that to anyone, not even Tomoyo. He hurt me so much, more than he will ever know.

It's funny though, because I was finally beginning to get over it, even if it was a slow process. Soon I would've been able to be able to do things without thinking about him, but all the progress I have made has declined. Seeing him with her brought me back to where I was at the very beginning, and that makes me want to scream at the top of my lungs. I feel like I have failed myself. I promised my own heart that I would get over him and help it from breaking, but I lied to it. I really am weak, aren't I? I went from being a rock to a puddle of mud. Way to go, Sakura, right?

My eyes began to burn as tears tried to let loose. It was so hard to hold them back. I couldn't let anyone see me cry, so I began to run down the sidewalk, dodging people in the crowd.

More than ever now, it was becoming almost impossible to keep myself from crying. So I only ran faster, a few tears slipping out from the sides of my eyes. However as I ran faster, my footing became awkward. So when I got to an uneven spot on the sidewalk, my foot hit it weird, causing me to fall. I landed on my knees, but ultimately ended up on all fours, like a dog.

Pain shot from my scraped knees to my burning hands. That was when I just let my tears flow, making tiny spots on the concrete. I knew people were around me, watching me cry, but I did not care. I was too upset to care, really. I had to let everything go. All of my pain and heartache. I felt as though I hit rock bottom, no pun intended, and lost everything.

I kept thinking how much of a loser I was. I shouldn't care this much him since he hurt me so, but I couldn't help it. I still love him so much, but when it comes down to it, I just can't hate him. It would be so much easier if I did.

As I cried, still in the same position, the people around me were talking amongst themselves, pointing at me. With tears running down my face, I looked up, trying to find out why they were pointing.

"Look it's her!" a woman shouted, her finger almost touching my face.

"Yeah! It's her!" another person shouted.

The crowd became larger now, as I felt like I was getting smaller. I looked around and noticed people were looking past me at something, so I turned my head to where the building was. I looked in the glass window, where there were a few televisions, and right then I almost had a heart attack.

My face was as big as the sun on Japan's National News. Not only was I there for everyone on the street to see, but also all over Japan.

"What the f--" I whispered to myself. "What did I do to deserve this?"

For a moment I stayed there, just staring at the television screen. This has become a total nightmare for me. I knew it would be bad, but not like this. Now I will never get over it. It will be all over the television and on the supermarket tabloids. To some people this may be great, since they could like the fame, but not for me. I don't want to be all over the media, it is not my thing, which is why I really didn't want to go into mainstream acting. I'd rather keep my private life, so no one else will be able to live it along with me by watching it on television. However now it all changed. Now everyone will know about my life, and my relationship with Syaoran. To me this is a nightmare, one which I would give anything to wake from.

"Hey, you had a relationship with Syaoran Li!" a young school girl exclaimed, whipping out her cell phone. "I need to take a picture of you. My friends will not believe it!"

"Yeah, could I have your autograph?" a guy asked, handing out a pen and paper. "Make it out to Hikaru, it is for my wife since Syaoran is her favorite actor."

My eyes went wide. Here I am, crying my eyes and heart out, and no one seems to care. All they want is something from me. I wanted to scream, but my voice was trapped in my throat.

I stood up, watching the blood surge from my scraped knees. However I did not reach to stop it. I only looked at the crowd around me, staring at me in shock. They all looked as if they have seen a ghost or something. Yet I did not care. How could I care? I mean my heart is broken and my knees are busted open, there is nothing else that they haven't already seen from me already.

"Umm… Miss?" a voice said.

I glared as I scanned them over. "Leave me alone, and get a life," I said, and ran in the opposite direction.

I didn't know where I was heading, but I was just glad to get away from everyone. My knees did hurt, but I did not care, I still hurried anyway.

However I didn't get very far when I ran into someone. I was about to fall backward, when all of the sudden I was caught by someone. In front of me stood a tall guy with large muscles, who seemed to recognize me, since he smiled slightly. I then turned by head to see who was holding me up. That was when I wish I were caught by the ground instead.

"Sakura-san, are you all right?" Syaoran asked, and straightened me. "Thank God I was here to catch you."

I blinked, wondering if I was dreaming. I wish I were, since I knew I wasn't.

**_To Be Continued!_**

**_Please Review!_**


	6. Pride

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Card Captor Sakura. 

Hello everyone! I know it has been a long time, but it is hard to find time to write anymore. It really sucks, let me tell you. Well I hope you enjoy this chapter, it is a long one, too. And I am sorry if it ends weird, but I finished this at like three in the morning, so only God knows how much of my brain I used to write it. Lol Enjoy!

**Chapter Six**

"What happened to your knees? And why are you crying?" he asked, and reached into his pocket, and brought out a crinkled napkin. "Here, let me wipe--"

I stepped away and shook my head. "No. I am fine."

I stared at him, images of him that night with Meling flashing in my head. I could not get rid of those images that were burnt to the back of my skull. It seemed as though my mind did not want to forget them, almost like a way of mocking me. Yet no matter how badly they hurt, I could not stop thinking about it. Somehow, I do not think I really wanted to forget…

"Sakura-san," he said, a hopeless look stretching across his face. "When will you ever forgive me? I told you that what happened is a misunderstanding."

I shook my head, tightly closing my eyes; it was the only way to hold back my tears. "I can't do this with you, Syaoran-san," I said. "I can't do this ever."

His hand reached out to touch my shoulder, but I swatted it away. "I don't want your sympathy either," I said, and glared at him. Deep down, I hated being so mean to him, but it was the only way to keep me from becoming a puddle of tears and putty. I could not break down in front of him. I just know I cannot. I do not want him to know how much he had hurt me and most of all: how much I still love him.

"Listen, I know you must hate me, and I understand that," he said, and shrugged his shoulders. "But I can not help that. Yet I would like to explain everything to you. Will you meet me later so we could talk?"

I blinked, all the words I was about to say had gone to the back of my throat. I could not believe what he had just asked. Never in a million years did I think he would ask me to go out and talk. In addition, never did I think I would reply the way I am about to.

"I don't think my boyfriend would like that," I replied, trying to keep the most serious face possible. "So it wouldn't be a good idea."

As soon as I said the word "boyfriend," his face went blank, and most likely so did his voice, since he kept silent. I regretted saying it, but it was for the best. I mean turning him down will take the heartache away, right? Although somehow it could make it worse…

…Oh God, why did I say I had a boyfriend?

"Boyfriend?" he repeated, as if he were assuring what he heard. He then quickly stiffened and stepped back slightly. "Well I am happy for you, Sakura-san. However, I must go, since I have a press conference with the media. I am sure you know why."

I nodded. "Yeah. Tell them to get off my back, though. I really don't need all of this attention."

He smiled. "Sure, no problem," he replied in an awkward voice. He stepped over to his car and looked back at me. "I will talk to you another time, Sakura-san. Take care."

Before I got a word in, he got into the car and shut the door. I only stood watching as the car pulled away into traffic. I stayed there until the car became nothing but a tiny dot in the distance. And all over again I felt empty. I wanted him so badly, but I know I could never have him. It would hurt too much if I went back to him, because I do not think I could ever forgive him for what had happened. For what he did to my heart is probably the worse feeling I could ever feel.

--

"Oh, Sakura-chan, you have to go! I told Jiro and Kai that you would definitely be coming!" Tomoyo exclaimed, as she stood outside my bedroom door.

I have to hand it to her, even though she can get very annoying, she is persistent. She has been outside my door for about an hour now, and I do not think she is going to back down anytime soon. Yet when she wants something, she always goes for it.

"I don't understand why you don't want to. I mean, who cares if you seen Syaoran today. It's not a sign or anything," she said, tapping on the door. "Plus you need to move on anyway. Look he already moved on to Meiling, which is a total downgrade from you….You are so totally hotter than her."

At this point I was sitting at the edge of my bed, laughing. Even though I felt like bawling my eyes out, she seemed to make all that go away. Hell, I admit that she even made me smile uncontrollably. Yet that may also be because I really am not that hurt over seeing Syaoran. Do not get me wrong, I still am hurt, but for some reason I am slowly feeling different. It is not a bad different either, maybe it is because I am maturing or I am just trying not to think about what upsets me? Either way, I still knew that I could not blow her off, however I did not even agree to it in the first place. I was forced into the situation in the first place.

"Sakura-chan, are you alive in there? Or am I just talking to a dead body?" she asked, still tapping on the door. "I'm serious though. You are starting to freak me out. I seen this on a movie once, and let me assure you that no one lived to see the opening credits."

I figured it was time for me to unlock the door, or else she would be calling the cops any second. So I walked to the door and let her in. Her face lit up like a little kid in a candy store.

"Thank God!" she exclaimed, and put away her cell phone. "I was just about to call the police and then Jiro to cancel."

Yeah. I know her like the back of my hand. "I am sorry, Tomoyo-chan, I was sleeping. I must not have heard you."

She glared at me. "You heard me, you just chose not to answer. I see how it is, Sakura-chan," she said, and made her way into my room. "You blow your friend off when she is only trying to help."

I shook my head. "No, really. I didn't hear you," I replied, and smiled. "So when are we leaving?"

"Right, now," she said, and grabbed my arm. "We have to hurry, though!"

"But I am not dressed!"

"You should have thought of that before," she said, and managed to get me out of my apartment. "Plus you look fine."

I looked down at my grey sweat pants and white tank top. "Yeah, if I were going to a sleepover party," I said, and crinkled my nose. "Can't I at least change?"

She shook her head, and continued to pull me through the apartment building until we were outside. We got into a taxi, and headed off to a destination unknown to me. With my luck, we are going to a dance club, and I look like I just rolled out of bed, which I practically did.

"Where are we going, Tomoyo-chan?" I asked, curious.

"We are going to a karaoke bar," she replied, and smiled. "I originally wanted to go to a club, but you aren't dressed for it."

I rolled my eyes, and leaned my head against the window. "Well I would have been dressed for it if you had allowed me to change."

She swatted her hand on my leg. "Get over it, Sakura. We will go next time."

On the ride to the karaoke place, all I could think about was Syaoran. He looked and smelled so good, which almost took the breath from my lungs. As soon as I seen him, I wanted to hold him, and confess my never dying love for him. I wanted to do that so badly, and at the snap of a finger have everything to go back to how it was when we were first dating. I would give anything for that to happen. It can only be wishful thinking, but it would be heaven if it could happen.

I really regret lying about having a boyfriend. The look on his face after I said it was so sad. It surprised me a little, since he did have Meiling, so why would he be upset if I said I had a boyfriend?

Guys are so hard to read. Even though they think we are confusing, they are even more like a puzzle. They do not know what they want, and when they believe they do, their minds end up changing anyway. I shouldn't even waste my time anymore, but then why do I always think of him? He hurt me, and yet, my mind always wanders to the subject of him.

"Sakura-chan, we are here," Tomoyo said, tugging on my arm. She slid out of the car and quickly ran to the door entrance, where Jiro and Kai stood. "Hey guys!"

I got out of the car a minute behind her. I was so nervous. Honestly though, I really did not want to go. Kai is a real nice guy and all, but in the end, he is not the guy I want to be with. I know a person cannot have everything they want, but it would be nice if I could just have one.

As I walked over to them, Kai's face lit up. Even though I was not wearing anything fancy, he still looked at me as if I were. It was sweet, really it was. It somehow made my heart sink in my chest. He was so happy to see me, but happiness was the last emotion I felt about coming there.

"I'm so glad to see you again, Sakura-san," Kai said, with a big smile.

I looked at him and nodded. I had no idea what to say. I do not want to lie and tell him that I was glad to see him, although somehow, I did not mind it. Weird, huh? Emotions really are strange now that I come to think of it. I honestly did not want to come along. I wanted to stay home and curse Syaoran's name all night. Yet a little part of me was happy I was not doing that. But then, hell, what do I know?

We went inside the karaoke bar, where people sat at little tables, cheering people as they sang on stage while smoke hovered in the air. It was an unique atmosphere. No matter how horrible you are at singing a certain song, the audience will always cheer. However not even knowing that would be enough to get me on stage.

"Come on!" Tomoyo shouted, and chugged down her bottle of Sapporo beer. "Someone sing some L'arc en ciel! Not Morning Musume."

I swatted her arm. "Tomoyo-chan, be quiet or we will get kicked out."

She laughed and shrugged her shoulders. "Oh Sakura-chan, you worry too much. Besides, I can't help it that these people-" she turned to the stage and lifted her hands to her mouth "-can not pull off singing Morning Musume!"

Kai leaned over towards me and whispered, "She is so wasted, and she only had two bottles of beer."

I sighed and grabbed on to her arm. "Tomoyo-chan, how about we leave? This is boring anyway. We could go home and drink there, and then pass out on a nice couch or something instead of this dirty floor."

She looked at me with a puzzled look on her face. Her eyes were glazed over with gloss and redness began to show underneath it. "No. I won't go until I sing one song!"

She stood up, and before I could stop her, she pranced on stage, bumping into chairs and tables along the way. Her shaky hands gripped the microphone, her tiny legs wobbly.

"This song goes out to my dear friend, Kinomoto Sakura," she slurred, and pointed at me. "If it were not for her I would not be here tonight."

She laughed and snapped her fingers, queuing the music. My head sank to the table in embarrassment, while Jiro and Kai tried to divert their attention away from Tomoyo.

"Aitai na aenai na setsunai na kono kimochi… Catch You Catch You Catch Me Catch Me matte…" she sang, slowly swaying along with the peppy music.

I wanted to jump into my empty glass and hide there forever. As I said before, I love her to death, but sometimes I wish I did not even know her.

A few songs and a lot of bottles of sake later, Tomoyo managed to get us all kicked out of the bar for being too rowdy. Although I would not have considered her being rowdy. I would say she was just being friendly with everyone; however sitting on the laps of some of the guys may have gotten a little too friendly. Anyway Jiro and Kai had Tomoyo between them with her arms around their necks. She could barely walk, so she basically drug her feet on the ground while we walked to the nearest corner for a taxi.

"Sakura-san," Jiro said, and pulled Tomoyo closer. "Are you going to let her stay with you? Because I do not think we should let her stay by herself."

I nodded. "Yeah, of course I will let her stay," I replied, and looked at her. She was going on and on about the prefectures of Japan, soon she would be naming all of the districts. "I will just have to tape her mouth shut.

Jiro and Kai both laughed, and I laughed as well. The whole situation was so funny, even after seeing Syaoran. Nothing has been going right at all for me, but for a split second none of that mattered. It lifted a huge weight off of my shoulders, let me tell you.

"Osaka, Sendai, Yamaguchi," she stopped, and made a big shocked noise. "Hey that is Syaoran! He is so hott! But why is Sakura on the TV too?"

"What?" I said, and quickly changed my gaze to where she was looking. Behind the glass of the store window were a couple of televisions, all on the same channel. Low and behold was a picture of me while Syaoran talked on some celebrity talk show. "Why am I--"

I stopped talking when I read the kanji written at the bottom of the screen. It read: KINOMOTO SAKURA, YOUR AVERAGE COLLEGE STUDENT GONE FANATIC OVER LI SYAORAN. My jaw dropped to the ground. I could not believe it. Syaoran just told all of Japan that I am a stalker of his. How ridiculous! How could he do such a thing? And why? What did I do that encouraged him to do this?

"What does this mean, Sakura-san?" Kai asked, standing beside me. "Are you really his stalker?"

I shook my head. "No. This is all just a misunderstanding. It just has to be."

Kai tilted his head. "Well, obviously he thinks you are."

I blinked a few times, but still I seen my picture. Hell, I even pinched myself to see if I was dreaming, but unfortunately, I was not. It was all true, blatantly flashing before my eyes.

"What is going on?" I asked, pressing my palms against the glass. I stared at the television screen, watching Syaoran talk with a huge smile on his face. I had no idea what he was saying, but I bad feeling about it. Why on earth would he want to tell all of Japan that I am a stalker? Why would anyone make up a lie like that? If anything I should be the one making him look bad, since he was the one who broke my heart and made me embarrassed.

"What are you going to do about it?" Kai asked, putting his hand on my shoulder.

I knew that Syaoran could not see the dirty looks I was giving him, but that did not stop me from doing it. In fact that point only made me think about the revenge I could take on him. I could not let him think that he has gotten to me. I just cannot, that would be like giving up and throwing up the white flag when there was a chance of recovery. I cannot chicken out. I have to suck it up and put my feelings for him to the side.

"I will get you back, Syaoran." I continued to glare at the screen while a smile crept across my face. "Then you will see who the fool is."

"Yeah!" Tomoyo shouted, raising her open arm in the air. "I ain't the fool, Syao---whatever his name is! Neither is Saku--"

Her head fell limp to the side. Her eyes were closed and did not make a single sound after that, except for a loud grunt. We all laughed and helped her into the taxi that had just pulled to the corner.

On the way back to my apartment, I kept thinking about Syaoran being on that talk show and how he made me look like a crazy person. It made me so angry, which is why the notion of revenge tickled me pink. For my own pride I could not let him get away with this. I do not even care that he is a celebrity who needs the perfect image. Before all of the fame and fortune, we were just Syaoran and Sakura; two ordinary kids who were in love and had a girl come between them. Typical drama, but the only difference is that it happened to me, not some celebrity.

**--**

**To Be Continued!**

**Please Review!**


	7. The Opportunity

Wow. I don't know what to say. It has been forever since I updated this story. I found this chapter, so I thought I would upload it. It's not very long, but oh well. If I get enough people to read this and who are interested, I will continue with it. If not, I'll leave it be. Just comment and tell me. :)

**Chapter Seven**

"Man, what a headache, Tomoyo said, as she put her hand to her head. With her other hand she tossed a bottle of medicine into the garbage. "They were a waste of money. My headache did not go away in a 'flash'!"

I laughed. "Well you were the one who insisted on going to a karaoke bar, when you know you get plastered before you sing."

She shrugged her shoulders. "I only get like that so I don't remember it. I mean, we both know I am not exactly Utada Hikaru."

We were inside the local coffee shop, trying to get our caffeine fix after only having three hours of sleep. While we were sitting there, I kept wondering about what I had seen on the television. Still the thought of him telling the whole country that I am some crazy person is sort of unbelievable. I mean, it's not everyday you have your ex go in front of whole population and say "Yeah, you know my ex-girlfriend? Well she is a stalker, and still thinks we are together! Isn't that funny? She is crazy!"

I mentally yelled, "What am I going to do?" as I tapped my head off of the table a few times. It did not help at all; it just successfully gave me a headache. I wanted to seek some kind of revenge, but what could little me do that could possibly hurt big, popular Syaoran. Unfortunately the people with the wealth and power always get the last say. I wish I had some sort of supreme magic that could change all of that. The only thing I could do is wish.

"Sakura-chan, don't bang your head off the table. It is embarrassing," Tomoyo said, and slowly sipped her hot tea.

At that moment everything inside of me exploded. "Embarrassing? You think that is embarrassing?" I asked in a crazy voice, only really loud. "Try having a person you once loved telling all of Japan that you are a crazy stalker! And not only that, you have to see that person with another who is so not worthy of him! How do you live with any kind of happiness after that?"

Tears were budding at the corners of my eyes. I didn't care anymore. I could care less that people in the café were staring at me as my face was streaming with tears. I figured it was the perfect trade off, since I deserved to cry buckets after all that I have been through.

Tomoyo could only look on with sympathy in her eyes. I could tell she wanted to say something, but she held her words inside of her. I think that made me feel relieved. I don't know what I would have said to her if she did say something. It didn't matter if it would be nice and endearing; I think I would still flip out on her. I was just glad that she was there and did not walk away from me. Sometimes even actions speak more than words. Just to have her there with me made me feel slightly better.

After I calmed down, Tomoyo and I went back to my apartment. All I wanted to do was lay in my bed and cry. I know that should be the last thing I do, but I had no energy to do anything else. I feel as if I had just run the 5k, but in reality I got nowhere. I'm just going in circles anyway. I am happy one minute, sad the next. It seems as though I will never make it to the finish line.

"Sakura-chan, no matter what, I will always be here for you," Tomoyo assured as we walked up the flights of stairs to the floor my apartment is on. "And if you want me to beat up Syaoran I will. Hell, I will scare him so much that he'll win an award for his acting."

"I know, Tomoyo-chan," I said. "I know."

We got to my door when I noticed a pink envelope taped to it. My name was written on it neatly in small characters. It looked professional though, since it has a seal holding it together. I took it in my hands and began to open it.

"I wonder what it is," I said, and pulled out a piece of folded whit paper.

"Maybe it is a letter from your secret admirer or something," she said, and peered over my shoulder. "Or maybe it's fan mail. You never know, Sakura-chan, you could be famous! Oh my God, I am friends with—"

"Shh," I said as I read over the letter.

It said:

"Dear Kinomoto Sakura,

My name is Yamaguchi Mai, and I am with the National News of Japan. Our newspapers are sent out every Sunday, and is the most read in Japan.

We have followed your story with celebrity Syaoran. Whether you are or aren't some crazed fan or ex-girlfriend doesn't really matter to us. However if you can prove you once had a relationship with him, we'd be willing to offer you compensation for giving your side of the story. We don't normally don't cover celebrity gossip, but we'd like to add a new entertainment section of our paper, and we'd like to have your story be its first.

If you are willing, please contact us. The phone number is at the bottom of this letter."

I read the letter three times. I wanted the words to sink in, but I was still bewildered.

"What is it?" Tomoyo asked, growing impatient.

"Uh," I said, and thought about what I would say, "the national newspaper wants me to give my story of what went on between Syaoran and me."

Her eyes bulged. "What? You've got to be kidding me!" She jumped up and down. "Here is your chance to get back at him, plus you'll get famous in the process!"

Could I really use this opportunity to give dirt on him? I know that I said I would get back it him, since I have every right to. He told Japan that I was just a stalker. He did not exactly ruin my life, but for a couple of months it is going to be very embarrassing for me. If I talk badly about him, what kind of things would happen to him? I want to get even with him, not ruin his career.


End file.
